How To Date A Law School Student

Seven Things To Know Before Dating Someone In Law School

Lawyers need love too. Sometimes, we forget that. Ever notice how easily you can make someone laugh by comparing lawyers to sharks, snakes, skunks, rats, roaches, and wolves? And who hasn’t quoted Shakespeare’s “let’s kill all the lawyers” line? Sure, they’ll argue to the last breath and complicate the simplest concepts, but the fact is, they’re really people just like us. More important, they’re spouses, parents, and friends to people who aren’t lawyers.
Go to any law firm and look around. Pick someone and tell yourself, “This guy wasn’t always a lawyer.” At one time, he was a student who wanted to serve the greater good. As nature would have it, another person—who was just as naïve—fell in love with him for it. Before the doubt and self-loathing, there was love. And it was a beautiful thing.
It isn’t easy to date law school students. They’re perpetually busy, tired, and angst-ridden. They dwell on their ranks… and every conversation seems to deteriorate into a contest. “They’re the product of their environment,” you think, coming down on the nurture side of the nature versus nurture argument. And once law school is over, you believe your lives will return to normal.
Probably not, if you read this post by Katie Marie, a Bay Area writer who reminds us that hell hath no fury like a significant other scorned. Hyperbole aside, Katie Marie makes a great point: School changes relationships irreversibly. People change—as do their priorities and penchants—under the weight of realizing their dreams. Make no mistake, law students are under tremendous pressure… and that’s even before the stress they impose on themselves.
So, are you attracted to a fetching 1L or muddling through with a self-absorbed 2L? Well, check out Katie Marie’s checklist below to see if this relationship is really worth the effort.
1. When you fight, you will never win: “Give up arguing with a law student because he or she will not back down (arguing is practically their job)… Thus, be emotionally ready because they will find some defamation of your character or numerous evidentiary examples of why they are clearly winning the argument. In the end just accept the fact—they are always right.”
2. They will dictate all preferred times and methods of communication: “…You need to know that you will not stay awake until the wee hours of the night talking about your dreams and goals until one of you falls asleep. If you’re lucky, 10 minutes on the phone with your sweetie is like Christmas morning (it only happens once a year). The most revered communication in law school is the occasional text or G-chat. In between hours on their computer, Facebook is still their chosen form of procrastination… Oh, and here’s a line you need to be familiar with: “Don’t call me, I’ll call you.”
3. Resentment is a cruel, cruel reality: “…Their three hours of reading has now turned into five and the fact that you get to watch The Real Housewives of New Jersey will be a source of bitterness to your weary scholar. So be prepared for him or her to take their frustrations out on you. Try not to take it too personally.”
4. When they are with you, they are thinking about law school: “Dating someone in law school is like dating a crack addict looking for their next fix. They have the constant itch to think about what their professor thought of their answer in class, what chapter they need to read, or what paper they need to finish… it’s just the harsh reality that law school will always win over a date with you. You are not their number one priority, you probably rank somewhere just under sleep. Ouch.”
5. It’s not you, it’s them: “Law students are busy people who need to focus on two things: school & themselves. They tend to constantly be ‘unavailable’ and ‘overwhelmed.’ …unless you have the time, the patience, and/or the compassion of a saint, dating a law student will either end in a viciously disastrous fashion or you’ll be married in no time, because if you can withstand three years of law school, you can handle anything.”
To read the full column, click on the link below. It’s worth it!
Source: Thought Catalog